Acceptance is a gift
You will have heard about the different stages of grief of which acceptance is one of them. From experience grief is not something that follows a standard formula for each one of us will navigate through this path in our own unique way. One of the stages of grief is known as acceptance where you accept where you are and accept the path of least resistance. I am here.
It has taken a long time to reach this sense of I am glad to have reached this small summit for it is just that, for we don’t know when we might fall on our knees again, but going through pain does make us appreciate nothing else can hurt as much.
The other day, I found myself going through my old journals. I started to write daily well before my father passed and this has continued as my coping mechanism ever since. I found an entry in my diary dated 16th December 2013, where I wrote a letter to God with a desperate plea for God to take my dad away from physical pain. A few pages further I found another note dated 19th February 2014 where I wrote “I don’t believe this..”. This was in response to an unexpected life insurance payment that I did not know about.
When I look back on the many challenges my father and I faced together we always knew we weren’t alone.
I love words and am fascinated by how words can lift us if used in the right context and with the right intentions. So acceptance is defined as “the action of consenting to receive or undertake something offered”. In the Oxford dictionary it is described as “the act of accepting a gift, an invitation, an offer, etc…”. I can now say I have accepted the gift of my father’s life and the death of his physical presence which has left a gaping void in my being, and I am totally okay with that.
If you happen to be reading this and you are going through a difficult time which seems impossible to get through, try if you can to take the path of least resistance and it time by accepting whatever you are going through will help you to find some meaning and purpose even in the pain you feel. I hope like me one day you will see the cause of your heartache as a GIFT.
8th February, 2022.