The start of spring

Hi, hello and Nameste Pops.

How are you doing? Great, I hope. I have been in our home, the home you insisted we buy since you’ve been gone but I feel you here and everywhere I go as you reside in every cell of my being. What we shared is so powerful that even on my not so great days I feel your unconditional love encouraging me to keeping moving forward.

Since the book came out Dad, I have done some interviews on BBC radio Leeds and Yorkshire. It’s been a surreal journey, the presenters were so sensitive i and kind n how they went about with the interview and it seems their audience were touched by the subject matter. I am amazed by how well the book has been received. I know you are proud of me and I appreciate that very much. 

Today is a beautiful cold day. I feel content and at ease. It occurred to me that my book is a watershed moment for me, a turning point to move forward on my terms and for me. I am giving myself permission to be free from the pain of separation and to cherish as well as celebrate my life with you as you are still playing a starring role in my story. 

Now that is an epiphany of sort. I bet you are delighted to hear this something you probably wanted for me from day one, but Pops, it’s taken me 7 years and 25 days to get to this point. Better late than never I hear you say and about time!!

Sometimes I wonder where you are funny as that contradicts with my saying that you are with. If you have taken a new birth then you will be 7 years old and if you are in the astral universe, waiting for me to join you I bet in both places you are having a great time and you are loved.   I am sure God is taking very good care of you.

The epiphany doesn’t mean I won’t have moments when I wish you were with me in my physical world but it does mean I am changing course. I am able to see a clear road ahead father I think I am heading towards home where you are, but the heavy fog has lifted, the debris has cleared and I am walking amidst a row of large swaying oak trees,  walking with some renewed energy and purpose in my armoury.

I hear the birds singing and the sunlight breaking through. As I end this letter to you my darling father I need to tell you about a call I received today from a lady who got her first job working for you some 45 years ago, I think you know whom I am referring to.  She said she read my book and in each line  she could see you, her Uncle. She said I am an image of you, wow, that was so lovely to hear and so kind of her to take the trouble to ring me to say so. I realise Dado, I can’t continue on this journey without the blessings of these fine people who knew and loved you. If, in me they remember you then I feel honoured. I am doing justice to your memory and to my life by being me and by being my father’s daughter😊

I love you Pops.


Ps. To anyone on a similar journey if you happen to read this letter to my Dad, I hope it will help you connect with your loved one. I know the pain of separation is heavy but lighten the load on your back by remembering the many good times you will have shared together. Grief is powerful it forces us to go a place where we find something beautiful and precious about the love we were incredibly blessed to feel but we have to let go to to feel!

Peace be with you.

Daxa Patel - My Dad and Me

Daxa Patel – My Dad and Me

24th January 2021