I cannot believe that the one person in the world I want to read this blog, never actually will. My father was my everything. Words simply cannot and will not ever do justice to what this amazing, kind, wonderful, beautiful, generous, loving and caring man meant to me and the people around him.
Words cannot and will not ever truly describe even with my ability to express, the gaping hole in my world now since his passing. It has been five years, eight months and 8 days to the day as I write this since he left, and it feels like yesterday.
Every now and then the universe produces a very special kind of soul. He was that to me. I had the good fortune of having him as my father, mother, best friend, brother, sister, teacher and soulmate since I was born. We were inseparable yet different. I still cannot bring myself to delete my Dad’s numbers from my mobile phone and when I look at his picture though I smile there is a heartache. Sometimes without any reason tears overflow and I realise though I have come a long way there is a yearning to sit next to him one last time and laugh out loud again. One wish that cannot happen in this life time. I write this because I would never have achieved anything without my father. If I have helped anyone in anyway or inspired anyone, it is all down to my remarkable and extraordinary father. Put simply, I am because of him.
Two weeks ago I had a bench placed at our local park where Dad and I used to go for long walks. It is a strong and well made bench made of teak and the plaque reads
What a wonderful world
Sit down and enjoy the view
In loving memory of Manhar Patel
My Dad loved the song What a wonderful world by Louis Armstrong. This park is gift to our community and is a really place of natural beauty. The bench is in a cosy and quiet spot surrounded by beautiful trees and on a clear day you can see the lake. When I heard the bench was in situ I went to see it as it was something I had wanted to do for a long time. Sitting on the bench and around was a family having a picnic, I thought perfect..
Sometimes, I stop, I turn off my mobile and just watch the beautiful tall trees swaying in the wind and the clear sky. I remember the poem Footsteps in the sand written in 1936 by Mary Stevenson, there’s a line in there ” Lord, you said once, you’d walk with me all the way, but I noticed that during my saddest and most troublesome times of my life, there was only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why, when I needed you the most, you would leave me. He replied, “When you say only one set of footprints, it was then I carried you.”
I have seen God through my father’s loving eyes. There have been many a moments since my father’s passing when I have needed him the most and I quite possibly didn’t realise then but he was there.
Faith and love are two powerful parts of our life. Sometimes we just have to believe we will make it to the next day. Just don’t give up hoping that you will make it through because you will.
7th September 2019